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I'm Thinking Pie

"I'd say this is one of the best books you're ever likely to read. Mainly because it is about me. This is likely to become one of those classic books studied (and admired) in literature classes, and probably history classes too once I've achieved everything I plan to. If you don't like this book, or don't understand it, then you're obviously an idiot."


"This book is, quite frankly, embarrassing. It's just a horrible record of how utterly useless I am, how I know nothing about people, or love, or life, and I'd suspect that everyone reading it will take about two seconds to decide that I am a total idiot who is not worth paying any attention to."


"This book is another way to pass the time during your meaningless life, to distract yourself from the fact that at some point in the future you will die and it will not take long for your existence to flitter away into nothing. Enjoy."


It's 2002 and a group of 19 year old girls start their second year of university somewhere in dreary England. Their lives are filled with the trivial toils and tribulations that all young adults must face. How they choose to approach life will shape their decisions, friendships and future. 


This is a frank, funny and raw portrayl of life as a young woman. Over-confident, over-sensitive, or darkly morose, it's down to the reader to work out who's narrating and discover how it all ends in bloodshed.

I'm Thinking Pie cover v2.jpg

Author's note:

I wrote this novel in my early twenties, way back before social media was a thing. At the time it was going to be my entry into a successful writing career, but of course these things never pan out how you think and one way or another you take on another degree and get distracted with a career as a health professional.

Anyway, now I guess it's a retro piece because it's set in 2002. That makes me a little depressed but it's cool to capture what life was back then. (Boring. Life as a young adult was boring.)

The narrators were grown from seeds of my own personality, and are certainly not what I think of the world and the people around me. My thoughts are much, much worse.

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